It takes courage to be confident. You have to be daring enough to say yes to the unknown, knowing that you might “succeed” or “fail”. It’s the courage to step out of your comfort zone that leads to confidently engaging in the world….
I was recently introduced to the Set Aside Prayer (a practice regularly used in the 12-step program) by a close friend and mentor this past week. I have to admit, I am not one that really "prays" very often. I have my own relationship with what I see as a "higher power", and praying to the universe, nature, however I see it, isn't something I generally lean towards as a practice. Yet, something struck me about it and I decided to give it a try. It's a way to just let go of whatever I am holding on to so I can truly open up to what is real and in front of me.
The Set Aside Prayer (Original)
God, Please help me set aside
everything I think I know
about myself, my disease,
the 12 steps, and especially You;
So I may have an open mind
and a new experience
of all these things.
Please let me see the truth.
As much as I appreciate the original prayer, I knew in order for it to work for me, with who I am, what I believe, and how I view the word God I wanted to meld the prayer into my own. So I made it basic.
Let me set aside.... (fill in with: whatever is holding me back or creating a belief system)
Repeat as many times as need.
Simple. That's all it needs to be.
This prayer is something I plan to suggest to clients when wrapped up in whats holding them back. I work with people daily to help them shift their personal beliefs and to release barriers holding them back from truly making the impact they desire in the world. I am seriously blessed to get to witness these individuals make huge, yet subtle shifts in their perspectives and their lives. And surprise, surprise -- I get to do the same work with myself (with the help of my coach, friends, & partner). I have a lot of my own limiting beliefs that sneak into play and hold me back. So for the past week and moving forward I am playing with this prayer, to let go of what is holding me, be it "good" or "bad", and see what comes from really being open without any preconceived notions.
So, I share with you my prayer from the first day I practiced, it could be the same each day or different depending on my current barriers and views. Not all that I set aside is necessarily holding me back, some are huge successes in my life, and being in experiment with letting it all go -- thats where the magic of possibility really lies. We are all human, each having our own sneaky gremlin voices (inner-critic) chiming in... here is a view into some of mine -- both gremlins and my higher self.
Set aside what I think my business should be
Set aside that I have to make a difference, a great impact
Set aside being a coach
Set aside wanting to heal the planet
Set aside my success
Set aside being an entrepreneur
Set aside self-doubt
Set aside having to find clients that really want to make an impact in the world
Set aside having to figure it all out
Set aside being an outdoor/adventure enthusiast
Set aside having to save the world
Set aside all my fears of being a business owner/ entrepreneur
Set aside pragmatic/ logistical Lindsay
Set aside what I create isn’t useful/helpful/worthy
Set aside having to make it perfect
Set aside the details
.... and the list goes on.
Brining a voice to all the thoughts, beliefs, and barriers made it possible for me to get super clear on the project I was working on. It made me even more confident in who I am, what my business is, and what I want to bring to the world.
My journal entry on Ora Māia's work with clients, after I first practiced this prayer was:
I want to make your heart beat harder and faster, to remember what it feels like to be alive, to see how you can break through personal boundaries and achieve what it is that you want to achieve. I want your heart to light up with that crazy warm feeling, in a simple state of disbelief that you actually just did “that” – whatever that “that” may be. To live in a state of freedom, curiosity, and exploration of life. To never be dormant, but to erupt in the full you. As a professional, an individual, and as a unit within the whole.
I help people feel alive, to thrive in who they are and to adventure beyond their greatest beliefs.
Again, simple and the truth. I was clouded by all of those voices and stories within my mind that I couldn't clearly see or remember what my purpose was.
Give it a go. Let me know what it does for you.
Trust. It's a bitch sometimes. Self doubt has the ability to take the reins and wrap its way deep into daily life, impacting every decision, thought, goal, or choice. Self doubt can sometimes feel like the all mighty, all powerful force controlling each detail, each moment. It can slap you in the face out of no where, even simply picking your ice cream flavor for the day... "are you sure you want chocolate mint? Cherry could be so much better."
So, self doubt is a part of each of us. It's that inner critic that both wants to protect and destroy, it is the enemy and the ally. I would seriously be surprised to meet any human that could honestly say they had never once in their life doubted themselves. The Buddha doubted himself, as did Jesus and Gandhi. Self doubt has got each one of us to where we are today, again, the enemy and the ally. And there have been moments, maybe many, maybe none, where trust has won favor, conquered the doubt and brought action into being.
Trust lives within us. That is what my coach (Kathy Ball Toncic, wonder woman herself!), has continuously had to remind me through the years. I am the only one who can choose to trust, to give my trust, and to receive others trust. It is my conscious choice to allow trust to lead me. So in those moments that self doubt creeps its slimy, sneaky way to the forefront of my thoughts and actions, I can pause and make a choice. A choice to trust or not to trust.
And maybe it takes weeks, months, or even years to just notice that the choice can be made in those moments, to decipher if self doubt is at work and if trust can swoop in. Maybe it takes weeks, months, years to build that inner trust. And maybe, with each moment that it is noticed, a pathway could shift, just a little bit, and trust will grow stronger, more natural, more alive. Then maybe, just maybe, self doubt will take the back seat, it might chime in every so often when it thinks it's needed, but trust will be the driver. What would be possible in your life if trust was in the drivers seat?
Awareness seems to be the theme of the month for myself and a lot of my clients. It is really linked to how present in the moment someone is. Present and aware of the personal world, of others, and of what is going on in ones surroundings. It's as if every moment is a meditation, a chance to be so alive, in awe, and landed. For the eyes to open so wide they can see beyond what is right in front of them. It's about noticing what is happening within when the world is happening around you AND, at the same time, actually seeing all that is happening around you.
Maybe this circumstance will ring a bell for you... After going to an event with a friend, she's like, "...and did you see the giant clown in a hippo outfit in front of us?". You think to yourself, what hippo? What clown? How did I not see that?
t's like you were physically there but so wrapped up in whatever story was happening in your mind that you weren't really there. These moments can be frustrating or eye opening. Your choice. It's like someone is knocking on your door, WAKE UP, look around, get out of your head (or your phone), and look around. EXPERIENCE life. See life. Have an active role in life.
Trust me, I am no expert. As a constant student, I feel like someone is knocking on my door constantly. Although I am a hyper observant individual, I still catch myself missing those valuable and "invaluable" moments. And when I realize I didn't see the clown or the hippo suit, I try to get real with myself and reflect (even if it's frustrating). I literally pause, where ever I am in the moment, breathe, and choose to begin again. It's up to me how present and aware I am in this life. And to be honest, I want to see it all, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I don't want to miss any hippo costumes.
I, historically speaking, was never a procrastinator. In high school and college I would jump at once to dive into assignments. Researching, writing, and actively completing projects that I was either interested in or uninspired by. I just thrived on getting it done, studying earlier, and feeling prepared and ready.
As I have launched into creating my own business, working for myself, and setting my own hours and workload I have witnessed a little change in my habits. One characteristic that is worth sharing is my attachment to control. In the past, I relished on being in control, wanting to have it all times, in all parts of my life. In the last few years I have put forth energy to release my need and desire to control all the time. In all honesty, I still have the control factor and I enjoy that part of myself, and I really appreciate dissolving some of my attachment to the constant need of it. So, with that, I have let go a bit, and since I have started to work for myself I notice the thin line I walk on completing necessary tasks and releasing the need of control.
So, I have started to play a simple game with myself to focus, complete a task, and feel at ease. It is easy and honestly, quite nice. I set a timer for thirty minutes, during this time I am completely focused on this one task. No social media, no text messages or calls (I even put my phone on do not disturb), no house cleaning, no snacking. Just me, my glass of water or tea, and the project at hand. Once the thirty minutes is up, I evaluate where I am, how much more time I might need, and can give myself a few moments to do whatever it is I see necessary. Super simple, a timer and a decision to focus. It is helping and reminding me of my joy to complete things that matter.
How could you stop procrastinating and jump into action? Do you have any tricks to share that might inspire another? And what is possible if you stop procrastinating and start acting?